Monday, May 28th, 2007...10:52 am
summer of george!
Balance is something that I have always struggled with. I am one of those guys who is ALL in or ALL out. I have found over my 30+ years here on Earth that a lot of this is just who God has wired me to be. ALL in for things I am passionate about and committed to, and ALL out for things that I am not. After identifying my God given strengths…Strategic, Futuristic, Relator, Significance, Deliberative (Now Discover Your Strengths) I have been able to align who I am with what I do, to maximize my reason for being on Earth. What is that you ask??? Simple, lead people into a personal relationship with Jesus.
So, back to balance. There was a time a few years ago that I was totally whacked out! Struggling deeply with anxiety, fighting insomnia, having general panic attacks and the craziest chest pains that the doctors could never figure out. I was messed up. I found myself on all sorts of meds, and trying to fix the symptoms. This went on for quite a while, and they really never solved the issue. So, I went ALL in. I dumped my doctor, dropped the meds cold turkey and took back control of my life. I dove deep into a healthily lifestyle with the right food, the right exercise, the right time with God, and the right balance at work. (Please do not hear me saying drop your doctor or meds if you are going through this! That might not be a good solution for you!!!) After a month or so most of the symptoms were gone. I lost my extra weight, felt better than ever, was running like crazy and things were going really well.
Then……I moved. Relocating to Oklahoma has totally jacked up my balance again. Talk about falling off the wagon…I not only fell off the wagon, I fricken dropped a nuke on it and blew it to a million pieces. My diet is whacked out, I’ve completely stopped running, and most importantly I have lost connection with most of my “mentors”. I have a few really good friends in my life that speak great truth into me, but the move has forced phone and email, and the relator in me needs the personal iteration.
So here is the deal. Time to go public with it and go ALL in. It’s the summer of George! (Seinfeld reference)…. Time to get the balance back, take control back before I totally slip out of control. Diet, exercise are the easy part. (I am pretty good with the God part!) I am really praying about some amazing friendships that will lead to the key person(s) I need in my life.
Quick side bar, I will be praying about trust…developing key relationships are next to impossible when you don’t REALLY trust anyone. Wow, that is a whole different post.
The summer of George Terry has begun!
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10 Comments
May 28th, 2007 at 12:23 pm
Terry, I’ve had to learn that this is a LOT more common than I recently thought. I’ve had different symptoms, but the anxiety and other related disorders have all been there for me as well. Being out of balance was a big part of it; I’ve recently lost 40 pounds (still have a few to go) and have started running in addition to the improved time I spend with God. It amazes me how much better I feel. And yes, it’s the interpersonal relationships that also help me along this journey.
Thanks for a great post. There are several more of us out here that are right with you.
May 28th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
been there- sort of in that place right now.
Luckily I’m on vacation and going to be spending some time soul-searching/God-searching and getting my balance back. It’s hard work sometimes and I go through it every 2 or 3 years… get crazy about getting organized, balanced, etc, then somehow I subconsiously throw a grenade in the midst and start all over.
If I still lived in OKC I’d love to connect with you (I will be coming for a visit in the next few weeks so maybe we can grab some coffee or something then) but I know some great guys up there that would be worth connecting with if you have time. Drop me a line.
Peace!
May 28th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Seems like a lot of people burn out in ministry…hmmmm….
Are you going to keep us all up to date with how you’re doing? Ahhh…blogaccountability. It was huge when I decided to drop some stress induced weight. If I didn’t promise to update people every Wednesday, I wouldn’t have dropped the weight, I’m sure.
May 28th, 2007 at 7:58 pm
wow–except for moving to Oklahoma, I probably could have written most of this!! thanks for being real–too many try to be tough and hide it all and then help no one (themselves or others!). Sure sounds like it’s pretty common…
I like Anne’s idea of blogaccountability…maybe a new 12 step program?
May 28th, 2007 at 8:01 pm
Oh yeah–btw–got to your site from Anne’s…am enjoying reading through your posts!!
May 28th, 2007 at 8:22 pm
Thanks guys/gals. Appreciate the comments.
Anne, wow, blogaccountability. I will see what I can do. This whole opening up thing is a wildly difficult process for someone who is “deliberative”.
I know I know….Im working on it. Actually, God is working on me is a better way to say it.
May 29th, 2007 at 9:46 am
I completely understand the trust issue. I’m a pastor’s kid who begrudgingly got into ministry too, and watched my parents get burned on numerous occasions by people they trusted. It’s made it so hard for me to find those relationships where I can give and receive and trust. I’m in a crazy season of church planting and have been praying desperately for that type of relationship. Crazy, but God brought my best friend from high school and college to the same city I’m now in (far from where we grew up) and he and I are renewing our friendship which is helping me huge. I know what it’s like Terry, I’m praying for you as well. Thanks for the openness, your blog is always such an encouragement in so many ways.
May 29th, 2007 at 10:19 am
What, no big block of cheese for the summer of Terry?
As much as it can feel like we’re giving it all we’ve got when we’re thoroughly immersed in work, we really give our best when we’re balanced. Bring on the summer!
May 29th, 2007 at 3:07 pm
Thanks for being so open about the issue of balance in your life. I struggle in that area too…and have to sort of put a bomb under everything every 12-18 months to re-vision, reprioritize, reorganize, etc. The one thing I’ve learned is that balance is dynamic NOT static…it requires constant vigilance and frequent recalibration. May the Summer of Terry get you back on the fulcrum of your life…doing what God made you to do!
May 29th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
Wow!, Can a digerati really be this transparent?
I think you have put in to words what many of us in ministry are going through.
I go through this every couple of years it seems. And moving makes it worse (one of the major life stressers, especially combining it with a new job!)
Great post Terry.
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